A major earthquake measuring 8.8 on the Richter scale hit Govan near ibrox,in the early hours of saturday morning.victims were seen wandering around muttering what the Hell:a dinne ken,and yahoorsur.the earthquake decimated the area causing £30 to £40 pounds damage.several priceless collections and mementoes from the balerics,Blackpool,and the costa del sol were damaged beyond repair.
3 historic areas of burnt out cars were disturbed,many locals were woken well before their giros arrived,the Glasgow courier reported that many residents were confused and bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in the area.one resident Karen Sinclair a seventeen year old mother of 5 said:it was such a shock that my little chardonnay Mercedes came into the bedroom crying,whilst my younger kids Tyler Morgan,Elisha storm,and shakira slept through it all…
I was still shaking when i was watching richard and Judy next morning.apperently though looting mugging,drug dealing,car crime and prostitution carryed on as normal,the british red cross has so far managed to ship 400 crates of buckfast tonic wine and sunny delight to the area to help stricken locals.rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantitys of personal belongings which include benefit books,jewellery from argos and fine bone china from poundies, how can you help!.
This appeal is to raise money for food and clothes for the unfortunates caught in the disaster,clothing is most sought after-the most needed include fila or fake burberry baseball caps,kappa trackie tops his or hers shell soots,white socks(ok of white will do)Rockport boots,donkey jackets and any other brand of clothing usually bought from the local more store,food parcels may be harder to come by but are needed just the same,required items include micro chips pot noodles,budget beans,ice cream,cans of irn bru or special brew and bottles of buckie..
22 p could buy a biro for filling in the compensation claims.£2 buys chips and fizzy juice for a family of 4,£5 buys a lighter and a packet of fags to calm the nerves of those affected,please do not send tents for shelters,as the sight of posh housing is unfair on the population of the neighboring areas surrounding IBROX park.please Also remain indoor after dark as flesh-eating zombies will walk the streets stay safe ..best defence against the hoardes holy water and some eggs Benedict.. Thank You
Sevco Disaster Appeal Please Give Generously send donations to Mr kings bank account or the sevco supporters fund where the money will be used to pay the facepainters !!!!!!!!!!